I have walked as a lost soul for the majority of my life. I know I am not alone in this. I think I knew exactly who I was best when I was around six or seven years old before many of my mental health obstacles became more apparent, and before I felt the pressure to succeed, be good-looking, be thin, be perfect, be wealthy, etc.

There is certainly no limit to the stresses that society, and our own desires, place on our shoulders. What happened to me, as I know it happens to many, was that I defined who I was by a picture that was never formed or painted internally. How others saw me mattered more than how I saw myself. What other people desired became what I felt I needed. Nothing was further from the truth. 

My birthday is coming up soon, and although I am turning 42 years old, I feel like I am really only two. There’s something magical about realizing the person you always were meant to be and embracing that person. Do I wish that I could have realized my full potential at an earlier age?  Absolutely. Do I regret any of my past… absolutely not.

I have struggled with health issues, both mentally and physically. I have also struggled financially, romantically, and questioned my own existence. I have an auto-immune disease that causes immense pain that is never-ending, and I certainly get frustrated with my ADHD and OCD.  I purchased and was forced to sell two homes… However, the key point is that all my struggles shaped me and opened my eyes to all I can become. They have tested me, at times broken me, but out of my struggles, I found out that I am deserving of love. We all are. 

Once I discovered that I was enough, exactly as I was, opportunities began to present themselves. Confidence bloomed, and I could envision the person I wanted to be as well as the path I needed to take to get there. 

Oftentimes, I would hold on to the negatives, the things that are unfair, or the things I felt set me back. That never helped, in fact, it held me back. I began to focus on where I was at and what I have overcome, the things I have accomplished, the blessings I have, and how lucky I am to be alive and have a chance to make a positive difference in this life. 

Do I still encounter negativity, absolutely. There are moments when I forget just how lucky I am to be able to breathe, walk, see, and hear. However, with continued effort, I am getting back to a positive mental place at a faster rate. The simple truth is that we will all face adversity, and we will all have difficulty, regardless of what our situation is or where we came from. The beauty is that our future is defined by who we want to be and how willing we are to get there. 

One of my favorite lines from the movie Terminator Two is the carving the character Sarah Connor writes on the table: “No Fate…” Which is a reference to a quote in the movie which is “No fate but what we make for ourselves.” I always loved that quote and its meaning. It struck a chord deep within me when I was much younger, but only now do I really understand why. 

No matter what you are facing, no matter what struggles you are currently in the midst of, never forget that you have the potential to do anything, and that means reshaping yourself, your mind, and your desires for the future. The moment we realize that our future can be positively affected by our current actions and our way of thinking, is the very first moment we are free to become our best. 

As we look towards a new year, with so many questions abounding from two years of struggle and loss, let us all move towards a destiny of hope, endless potential, and endless love. 
Best2all,~Kirk Patrick Miller @Chaos2Cured (IG/Twitter/CH)
Mr. Kirk Patrick Miller is a professional speaker, mental health advocate, and radio personality. His book “Chaos to Cured” and his contact information can be found at www.chaos2cured.com. 

———————— Disclaimer ———————

Mr. Kirk Patrick Miller is not licensed to practice medicine. His opinions are not meant or intended as mental health advice or guidance of any kind. Should you need help, please reach out to a mental health professional. If it’s an emergency, please call 911. (Suicide hotline: 1-800-273-8255